This probably should have been one of the first posts, but oops! I forgot.
We really have only been together for about a year and a half. Say what you want – we know we’re crazy. We also know that relationships can be so tricky and wishy washy & we don’t know where we will end up, just that we want to be together.
Connor and I met in real life for the first time in March of 2018 (the 16th to be exact). We initially met on… you guessed it.
Yep. There was a photo of me in a long black dress tha definitely highlighted my ass and he swiped right. I liked his beard so I swiped right, too. I was first to message him when we matched (no surprise there). Connor later told me that after I messaged him, he told his friends and showed them the picture of me in the black dress because I was the “girl with the nice ass” who messaged him on Tinder.
Connor is quite shy so he never would have said something to me if I didn’t initiate it. Lolz. I’m obviously glad I did! This was probably in early March. I went on a two week Tinder streek where I met eight guys in two weeks and Connor was #7.
Hold. Up. Before we continue, let’s discuss my two-week dating spree.
It was never physical. I met eight guys in two weeks from Tinder and Bumble because I WAS BORED. I was SO bored and sick of being hung up on this a-hole guy who broke my heart. I wanted to meet new people, go on dates, and just have fun. All eight either took me to dinner or met at a coffee shop. But even if it were physical, like, who cares? You do you, girl. Don’t ever let someone break you down for being a serial dater.
OKok so Connor was #7 and we met at a coffee shop and I instantly swooned over him. I remember going home and telling my mom he was “dreamy.” Also, I’m a sucker for outdoorsy guys. I dated a really feminine guy once and it was soooo not for me. I need someone who doesn’t take longer to get ready than I do. If you’re wondering how we matched with him living in Vermont, it’s because his college was within the 70 mile radius that I had my settings at. What’s funny is that he did not have his radius set that wide. He only had it set for campus. It was fate!!
Anywho, I thought he was so dreamy and handsome, but I knew he lived in Vermont and was going home after he graduated and I was skeptical of that. I wasn’t sure I wanted to try long distance because I HATE driving. Like, bad anixety, I don’t do well driving long distances, yeah.
Soooooo my dumbass chose guy #8 that I met on Bumble (literally two days after meeting Connor) because I thought he looked like Christian Grey from fifty shades, and ironically, his name was Christian.
This. was. a. mistake.
Let me explain. Connor was moving back to Vermont after graduation which was only a couple of months away. He also partied a little too hard with $1 beers on St. Patricks Day the day after we met and was blacked out by noon. I don’t drink, like, at all, so this was extremely unattractive to me and then the additonal Vermont thing didn’t really jive with me, you feel?
This Christian guy – he doesn’t deserve a name honestly. Let’s say #8.
#8 was a breath of fresh air for like two weeks before he became an extremely manipulative a**hole that tried taking advantage of me emotionally and after six weeks – physically. Yep. That’s exactly what it sounds like.
So after ending that, I reached out to Connor on snapchat and just apologized. I knew he was really into me after we met and I was into him as well. I low key wanted another chance with him, but didn’t imply that in the message. Actually, he simply insisted he drive up to see me just to hang out as friends after my apology. I was astounded. He knew I chose someone else over him, but he just wanted to be friends and possibly more at the time. He later told me that he knew he just wanted me in his life somehow, even if it was just a friend.
So long story short, he came to visit me from Rochester which is about an hour and a half from me. He’d also come visit me from Vermont. He did this steadily for about a month or a month and a half before I finally came to Vermont for the first time.
I knew I really liked him now. He kept coming to see me.. from VERMONT. FIVE HOURS. He even drove me to my commencement (and was the only reason I walked the stage on time – bc I was late).
My five year ex refused to drive 17 minutes to see me because of gas money.
We had a summer of romance and boy was I crushing hard. He asked me to be his girlfriend on June 9th, the first weekend I came to Vermont… and by September 30th I was moving in with him.
A lot went wrong here. It was my first time ever moving away from home. I went to a local college so I still lived at home throughout my four years. My mom is my best friend. I instantly regretted moving away from home and absolutely cried my eyes out saying bye to my mom. Every day, for like, a month.
I don’t want to make this too long, so let’s cut it shorter.
I lived with Connor in Vermont for ten months. It had it’s ups and downs. Overall, I realized that we had moved in too soon. We had only dated for four months prior and I don’t think either of us were ready to move in together just yet. We started fighting a lot about everything. Every. Little. Thing. Not only that, my job wasn’t working out and I was losing money. Also, I missed my mom.
I moved back home over the summer and it truly was what our relationship needed. It was hard at first, for sure. We even “broke up” for a little bit (just took some time off). We needed to re-evaluate.
But now we are back and better than ever! We still have our issues to work out, like all couples do. Oh, and his college party days ended a long time ago. He is still living in Vermont and I am living at home in New York. Before anyone asks, my part of New York doesn’t fit his hobbies. It’s flat. He’s a skiier and a mountain biker. We aren’t sure where we are going to live yet or what’s going to happen with that. And we don’t know where we’ll end up – just that we want it to be together.
P.S. #8 if you ever read this – fuck you.